Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Dear World, you piss me off...

I'm sure you have all had one of those days where everything pisses you off, no matter what.

Well, it is one of those days for me. I woke up just pissy as ever and haven't seemed to shake it yet. Anyone have any good jokes? haha.

So I decided to make this my vent for everything is pissing me and what I wish I could say to those contributing to my mood. Hope you enjoy.

Guy who cut me off: You're lucky I have brakes or your rear would have been bit by my bumper. The only reason I hit the brakes was because I was running late.

Sports girl: I understand you feel like you have something to prove being an old chick in sports, but sayin stupid shit and playing ridiculous noises on your computer is not the way to do it. FYI you are not a cougar give it up.

Bathroom phone girl: DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT talk on your cell phone while you are trying to pee, or others are trying to pee. Ever heard of a break room?

Sonic guy: Just give me my damn soda, I don't want your number and no I will not call you.

Man who wishes he was in charge: Don't complain to me about how much work you have, you basically have a 3 day work week. Instead, I work close to 50+ hours a week with the lack of help and do it with a "smile."

Alarm clock: I wish when I hit snooze you would go off in exactly 10minutes instead of making up your own mine. You need to be replaced.

Married guy: While your flirtatious comments and emails can be flattering, you are married and I have morals.

Ex boyfriend: I am tried of getting your damn playboys in my mailbox. Change the address or I will be forced to get you a subscription of playgirl.

Friends "boy toy": Look, I know you are just using my friend, it was very apparent when you offered to sleep with me in Vegas and have continued to do so. Don't worry, I will eventually convince her you're a loser.

Friend: I am so sick of hearing about your "boy toy" he doesn't want to be with you. I hate that you can't see his made up reasons for fighting are not a crutch, but instead a way to push you away so he can sleep with someone else. It's really hard biting my tongue when you talk about him.

Beer: Why do you have to have so many calories and not allowed at work?

I hope you all enjoyed my rant, the sad thing is I could go on but will save you all from my bitchiness.

2 comments:

Tamela said...

Totally understand pissy days. Sometimes you just need one. Hope your day is better tomorrow. The only jokes I know are the corny ones that I get on my lafty taffy I buy after eating at Los Portalas!

Lil' Woman said...

Love your list esp the beer! :)

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